I was...but now...
I’ve been on a quest to read more and I’ve stumbled into my 7th book. I particularly love when I’m given a message that was penned just for me. Truth be told, like my most people I normally do a great job of putting on a front. I literally go through my day in a robotic fashion hoping no one will trip my wire forcing me to reveal what’s going on behind the scenes. Sometimes in the moment, I forgot about all my past blunders and start operating within my own reason which leaves me panicked and exhausted at best.
As I was reading before bed last night, one line jumped off my page and started to bounce feverishly around my mind. It was simple and only four short words but spoke volumes to me.
I was…but now..
At first it looked like an incomplete sentence and I was wondering how the editor had dropped the ball like this. Instead it was paired with some additional words that provided context. The words, I was..but now… was called the chorus of grace. The truth of this was obvious as I thought back to every point in my life that left me down in the pits and some how I was pulled out..by grace.
Grace is the story of your past not being an indicator of your future. Grace is the story of what God can do when you allow Him to take hold of your situations when you least deserve it.
I had to test this phrase out with my own life to see if this held true for my darkest of moments. I was in a wheelchair but now I walk freely. I was in the deepest of depressions but now I see light. I was their prey but now I pray for them. I was talked about but now those same people read these words.
Grace is being thrown a life vest when you’re the one who purposely tried to sink the ship. I am the queen of self-sabotage and at one point it is what I did best. I chose to stay in ruts and I chose to operate as if life would not become any better because that was easy. It was easy for me to stay in this hole because it had become so familiar and comfortable. But grace. God started to share His grace which came in the form of new opportunities, loving people, and even the removal of those who had overstayed their welcome. It is hard to articulate what He had done with me because I was and still am constantly changing.
I’ve never been the most religious person...I can barely quote the bible and I don’t even know the Lord’s Prayer. All this being said, God still had enough to spare for me. Someone who cursed His name, doubted His power, and turned everywhere BUT to Him when I was down and out. That is the powerful thing about faith is that it doesn’t fail you like man can because it can actually carry you further than you can carry yourself.
I don’t know what’s going on in your life or what challenges you are facing that won’t seem to let up. I can’t promise that it will go away soon or if it will ever go away at all but allowing grace to fill in those broken pieces will do wonders. Choosing not to become stuck in your own mud will allow you to move three step furthers than if you become defeated and decide to give up. Reflect on your life and realize that you’ve managed to knock every curveball thus far and realize that grace will continue to help you do so as long as you remain in the game.